Goodbye is the saddest word you’ll ever have to say
A lot of you don’t know my “parents” situations. And I’m kind of getting tired of people asking, ‘where’s yours mom?’ ‘yo mama’ and they all don’t know what happened. Well, my mom passed away. Once they find out, they always ask how. I don’t like saying the story over and over, because it only kills me inside to relive the memories. So here’s the story one last time.
In December 2010, my mom was 7 months pregnant with a baby boy. And that night, late evening, she was on her way to the hospital. Her contractions were kicking in. She was in the delivering room after awhile. As for me, i was sad, sad because we all knew the baby was going to die. We had already knew the baby was going to die at birth though because it had problems. For a couple of hours my mom had given birth to my baby brother Jaden. He was given to my dad to hold. All the baby did was cry and cry and cry. I couldn’t help but cry too because this little baby had no idea that he would never live. 15 minutes later, Jaden had died in my dad’s arms. My mom was still in the delivering room, and then I started hearing a lot of noise outside. People calling for each other. My dad went outside and it was the doctors rushing my mom into the operating room. As she passed by, my mom looking shocked was asking over and over “whats going on?” What was going on? I couldn’t move from that thought of what could be happening. We couldn’t do anything but wait. Minutes and minutes have gone by until a nurse came to us asking that our mom was in desperate need of blood. My dad had to say no. It was against my mothers will and religion to take any. After the nurse came back more than 3 times asking to give blood, all time my dad said no. And the worse had happened, the words i wish i’d never hear.."i’m sorry, we lost her." The words killed me a million times. My heart was torn and stepped on. They took us to the room she was in, and there she was, Pale and cold and blood around her. Later on, the nurse came in with the baby, and layed him besides my mom, she told us “She never even got to see him.”
So that’s what happened. If i got anything from that moment, its that EVERYONE should appreciate having their mom around. Everything she does for you. Love her intentionally and beyond what you can because things can unexpectedly happen. You might wake up one day having your whole life changed. My little sisters still asks for her. I still wonder when her car is gonna pull up from work.
It’s horrible to say that sometimes I can’t picture what she looks like in my head anymore.. I miss her so much. That it kills me more when i see people who disrespect their parents.
I never even got to say goodbye to her. The last time i had talked to her was the argument we had the night before. Now i’ll NEVER get to apologize to her. The moment her casket closed, I knew i was never going see her face again.